现代版泰坦尼克号搞笑小品剧本

2018-07-13剧本

  旁白:It’s a cold evening. The Titanic has sunken. Rose, Jack and Oscar are on the life boat floating in the ocean. This is Jack. This is Rose and this is Oscar, her husband-to-be.(边说边介绍,三人坐在课桌上)

  Oscar:Oh, honey~ Are you OK? (边说边将手搭上Rose肩)

  Jack:She is my girl.(打开Oscar的手)

  Oscar:You are so cold.(脱下报纸披在R身上面向观众)what you wear, what you are.

  Jack:What are you doing! (扔掉校服,脱下自己的羽绒服抖了抖,面向观众)BoSideng(波斯登), warm and comfortable, it’s my choice.(将羽绒服披在Rose身上)

  Rose:(向Jack)I love you.(向观众)But I love BoSideng more.

  Oscar:Hey! She is my wife-to-be, who are you?

  Jack:I am I. Wo de di pan wo zuo zhu(我的地盘我做主).

  Oscar:People on the Earth all know, She, and I, will go to New York to have our wedding. Rose:But now……

  Jack:Don’t say any more! Take your knife out! (从口袋里掏出铅笔,紧握手中)

  Oscar:Ok. Let’s go fighting! (同样掏出铅笔紧握手中)

  Jack & Oscar:Fighting! (用铅笔互戳)----小蜜蜂~

  Rose:No, no, no! Please stop! (拉二人)( J & O不小心将Rose推下桌子——落水)

  Rose:Help, help!(Jack & Oscar将拉上Rose桌子)

  Oscar:Honey, how are you?

  Rose:(向观众)PiaoRou(飘柔), just so confident~(甩头发)

  (Rose不小心推Oscar,Oscar落水) Oscar:Help, help!

  Rose:Oh, no! (向Oscar伸手)(Jack抓过Rose的手,对视)

  Jack:(唱)你是我的玫瑰,你是我的花…You are my life, you are my honey~

  Rose:But……what about Oscar?

  Jack:Don’t pay attention to him.

  Rose:OK. Darling~ I love you, loving you, like mouse love rice~

  旁白:At this time, Oscar has been far away……Jack and Rose are still floating in the ocean. It’s colder and colder.

  Jack:Do you feel cold?

  Rose:Yes. You see we are so lonely.

  Jack:Don’t worry. I have this! (从口袋里掏出打火机,并向观众展示)This is a magic DaHuoji(打火机).(Jack按下打火机)(Superwoman上,胸前贴一张纸,上书S)


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